Reflections on Day of Dignity 2010

The impetus behind "Day of Dignity" can be drawn from our mission here at Islamic Relief USA, which includes "… to alleviate suffering …. and to provide aid in a compassionate and dignified manner." Over the course of the 2010 Days of Dignity, I’ve often been asked, “Why Day of Dignity?” My response is that events associated with the Day of Dignity provide an opportunity for people of all persuasions to be of service to people in need, at least one time, one day, one month of the year.

The last Day of Dignity event in Capitol Heights, Md., on Dec. 18th completed nearly a year of efforts and events that began last spring with training sessions for coordinators who, over the next eight months, would manage thousands of volunteers and serve many more thousands of beneficiaries.

Since the first Day of Dignity event at Fort Thompson in South Dakota last June, volunteers have worked selflessly to ensure that the event(s) in their respective cities went well. So engaged were they that, on occasion, volunteers ventured from one event to the next, from one city to another, to participate. To witness this was a blessing from Allah (swt).

Invariably, volunteers would gather early for work, long before the day was to officially start. And likewise, beneficiaries would begin to line up in anticipation of what was to come. Once the day’s events would get under way, I would witness the smiles on the faces of both those who gave and those who received.

To watch people queue up for a meal, health screening or a haircut and a few personal supplies reminded me of the adage, "But by the grace of God, there go I." I remember thinking that in a country so blessed with natural resources and human capacity, it was almost unthinkable that people would be homeless, that children would go to bed hungry and that too often some of our senior citizens would find themselves faced with the decision of whether to eat, pay their utilities or buy much-needed medication.

While Day of Dignity wouldn’t make any of those realities disappear, I encourage people to look upon it as a model.

It’s a model that packages concern and compassion and partners it with unbridled volunteerism, which then creates the synergy that has the capacity to help us find solutions to everyday problems facing our society. Ideally, people would look at Day of Dignity and see it as a concept that provokes action and begets positive results. If they find any pleasure in that activity, then I would encourage them to work to see that it is replicated, in some form, in other areas of the country.

As the last 2010 Day of Dignity event wound down last weekend, I went through the mental exercise of recalling favorite moments or a favorite moment from the different cities where the events were held. A volunteer in Washington, D.C., a young Christian college student, summed it up best when she said, "I just wanted to come and give. [I want to] acknowledge, if possible, some of the blessings I have received in life and try to provide some relief to those facing difficulty today. I have what I need, and so, I and others in similar circumstances should be willing to share with those less fortunate."

And I was then reminded of that tried-and-true saying: "To those that are given much, much is expected."

-- Saleem Khalid, Islamic Relief USA

Imams Learn How to Address Domestic Violence

One travelled more than 3,000 miles from California. Another spent over a day in New York amidst cancelled flights and mix-ups. And one more drove more than nine hours from Detroit without rest to arrive in time. They shared the fact that they were Muslim men and imams–religious leaders–but more importantly they were also united against a common and often hushed crisis in their communities: domestic violence.

More than a dozen imams from around the country came to a special workshop, “Preventing and Responding to Domestic Violence,” last weekend at The Fairfax Institute in Herndon, Va., to share, learn and gain effective tools to address domestic violence in their respective communities. Initiated by Peaceful Families Project (PFP), a nonprofit organization devoted to ending domestic violence in Muslim families through awareness workshops for Muslim leaders and communities, the two-day workshop was sponsored by Islamic Relief USA.

“[This is] about learning from each other,” said Imam Mohamed Magid, Executive Director of the All Dulles Area Muslim Society in Sterling, Va.

In a u-shaped classroom that served as their meeting space, imams relayed stories of how domestic violence affected their lives and communities. “[Domestic violence] knows no prejudice in who it affects, even the well-respected college professor who goes home everyday and beats his wife,” said Imam Said Seddouk, Director of the Islamic Center of San Gabriel Valley in Rowland Heights, Calif.

Other imams shared Seddouk’s sentiments. “Anyone can be a victim, and anyone can be an oppressor,” said Imam Jamil Dasti of the Islamic Center of Maryland in Gaithersburg, Md.

According to Salma Abugideiri, co-director of PFP, licensed professional counselor and event facilitator, perpetrators of abuse can include spouses, parents, adult or adolescent children, in-laws and other relatives.

More than 85 percent of abuse victims are women, according to the National Coalition against Domestic Violence. During pregnancy, a woman is at greatest risk for being battered. And while physical abuse is the most obvious form of violence, other forms–including mental, sexual, financial and spiritual–can be more psychologically devastating.

Abugideiri discussed the cycle of violence that affects a victim and perpetrator: When a victim doesn’t align with the abuser’s demands, tension builds that may escalate to violence. Afterwards, the abuser may feel remorse and seek forgiveness, with the victim often relenting.“It’s hard when you see a man crying not to believe he is genuine and sincere,” she said. “But as soon as the woman starts to act ‘defiant,’ the abuse will start again.

Imams expressed the necessity for active listening in counseling families. “Being an effective counselor means hearing both sides of the story,” said Imam F. Qasim Khan of Muslim Alliance in North America.

Abugideiri also discussed the residual scars of abuse: Children are often permanently psychologically affected by the abuse inflicted on them or a loved one. Children bombarded by negative gender roles will often imitate those roles in adulthood by becoming abusers or abused themselves.

At the end of the two-day workshop, attending imams signed a proclamation taking a firm stance against domestic violence. “People can get a clear sense that there’s a zero tolerance approach to domestic violence in each of their communities,” said Maha Alkhateeb, co-director of PFP.

Saleem Khalid, Islamic Relief USA’s domestic programs manager, said it was an honor for the relief and charity organization to be involved in the workshop. “Alhamdulillah, we’re pleased to be a part of the solution,” he said.

Abugideiri said she hoped “that [the imams] leave feeling more equipped to deal with cases of domestic violence and will become our allies in ending it.” She also expressed her gratitude to Islamic Relief USA for sponsoring the event. “They’ve improved our ability to respond to domestic violence,” she said.

To learn more about Peaceful Families Project, click here. To learn more about Islamic Relief USA, please visit our website.

--Muneeza Tahir

Congressman Ellison Honors Supporters of Muslim-run Community Health Clinic

University Muslim Medical Association, better known as UMMA Clinic, unveiled a decorative mural this past weekend bearing the name of all its donors, including Islamic Relief USA, a longtime funder and supporter of the clinic.

Saleem Khalid, IR USA's Domestic Programs Manager, has always been impressed with UMMA Clinic's work and said he was honored to attend the wall’s unveiling ceremony on Saturday in Los Angeles. Congressman Keith Ellison and Los Angeles City Supervisor Mark Ridley-Thomas were also on hand and spoke before a crowd of about 100 supporters.

"UMMA exists because of the people who care about the patients that it serves," Ellison told the crowd, who responded with enthusiastic applause. "The Muslim community in the United States is here to make a positive contribution to our neighbors, here to be a blessing to [the] community, and I can't think of a better example than the people here at UMMA Clinic," he said.
UMMA provides a wide variety of medical services to the underserved communities of South L.A., but one of their patients told the crowd it was more than just medical service. Arturo Garcia, a homeless man who bakes bread for a living, addressed the crowd in Spanish. He called UMMA’s relationship with the community a "brotherhood" and thanked those who support the clinic.

"Gracias UMMA," he said.

Islamic Relief USA has been one of the clinic’s top supporters since it was founded in 1996. More than 3,000 people visit UMMA Clinic every year to take advantage of the vital services, which include prenatal care, basic health services and immunizations for children.

"Islamic Relief USA is pleased to help support UMMA Clinic sustain the invaluable work that they do. The clinic's efforts to provide access to quality, affordable health care regardless of ability to pay, is consistent with our mission at IR USA, which is in part, to provide aid in a compassionate and dignified manner," said Khalid. "We look forward to a continued role in supporting the ever expanding activities of UMMA Clinic."

Rep. Ellison was impressed to hear about Islamic Relief USA's support of the clinic.

"I think it’s fundamentally important that the great work that Islamic Relief does around the world is reflected here in the United States," he said. "Americans need to see the beneficial presence of well-run Muslim charity organizations doing good work here in America," he added.

To read more about Islamic Relief USA's domestic projects, please click here. To see a slideshow of the event, please click here.

--Zeyad Maasarani